i think my sleeping pattern is getting screwed again, for no good reason. cant seem to get myself to sleep when im quite sure im sleepy. sigh. and i think i become crankier when i lack of sleep and i'll start to do all sort of funny and weird things. oh maybe no. maybe i'll just be really quiet tmr cos i have no energy. maybe that will do the trick.
today's 28th feb. that's kinda fast, oh correction, very fast. didnt remember that my secondary school year used to pass so quickly. last year this time? hahah i was probably busy with syf practices. interesting to note that i've been with 06s75 for two whole months. it feels like we are together for more than 2 months. but wells, somehow it feels that we have a long long way to go. feels like. i dont trust my instinct today.
anyway. i think the song 'the spirit carries on' by dream theater rocks... (: whee. thanks valerie for sending me that! shall post the rest of the lyrics some other day...
I may never find all the answers I may never understand why I may never prove What I know to be true But I know that I still have to try
If I die tomorrow I’d be allright Because I believe That after we’re gone The spirit carries on
(: 23:32
27 February 2006
ah ha. hope my cello's gonna be okay... dah. screw the curvature. anyway the a string just went totally loose when i kept my cello after cca just now, so im going to have a great time trying to tune it back on wed -.-
a tired start for the week. and hopefully the tutorials dont snowball (: but this is random but well, i wont mind if the school decided to sponsor us with yoghurts every week. [fat hope] i like the peach one i had today, but meiji yoghurt still rocks. which reminds me i should drop by the supermarket to do some snack-shopping some day. haha.
had quite a long talk on the phone with samantha just now, hahaha guess im still not used to talking for so long on the phone. cos my ears kind of hurt a bit after that. the phone felt really hot. and its kind of exasperating when there's something that should be done yet you feel so helpless about it. hmm. talking is a good therapy i realised, it helps to sort things out. and you wont feel so bad at least, knowing that there's someone who may probably feel the same thing. though at different intensities.
sometimes you just gotta know your limits. dont push. but it doesnt give you any reason to back off totally too.
okay im tired. shall go to sleep. sleep is good. whee. 22:48
26 February 2006
oh my goodness. this is scary and irritating at the same time. hmph. was practising on my cello just now when i thought i spotted a bridge that doesnt look quite right... and after scrutinising it for 5 minutes, i concluded it is not right. OUT OF SHAPE. unbelievable! ack. what the.
and come to think of it, i only changed it...last nov? x( dad is so going to kill me for that. and that was when i persuaded him like mad to let me change the stupid bridge and now this one proved to be more stupid than the previous one...
how how how how how?
i seriously want to cry.
=(
this is just so horrible... 18:21
25 February 2006
gone. diary-x just declared itself dead. and that means all my entries from last year and this year gone. 05 has been an eventful and thinking year and to a certain extent, a slightly painful one. think its time for me to try to move on from here. i really have to try. its been a good beginning for 06, maybe i can do it this time round. (:
and i realise my sensitivity seems to have done me no good. hmm. thanks xiaohong if you are reading this, the talk this morning helped... i guess.
ohh. and i need to start completing my tutorials. before i regret.
[edit] loves bryan. my little cousin rocks! (: he just brightens my days. hahahaha. [/edit] 15:16
took a really long time to reach home this afternoon. decided that i'll give the expressway a miss and took a long walk home instead of the lrt ride. 20 minutes. and the weather was cooling and windy, absolutely great [though hopefully i wont catch a flu cos of that] (: thought through quite some stuff and felt so much better after that. but well, it isnt really the case that im unhappy before all these or whatsoever, im just plain tired. ohhh and i actually regretted not signing up for the painting hse cip thingy. hahaha.
after this eunice will bounce back again =D and i must promise myself to try my best to do tutorials! shall slack no more, or hmm at least slack less. can someone motivate me to do my work? hmph.
somehow time kind of passes rather quickly recently. cant really believe that its already week 8 and yeah, almost 1 quarter into the year. 2006 still feels rather new to me. -.- can we go slower?
... 21:50
22 February 2006
okay. pls do not try to guess the identity of the person in the previous entry. hahaha.
anyway, im proud to declare that i have tons of tutorials left undone and im feeling sleepy all over again! i will need method 101 to stay awake in school if i intend to finish anything tonight. but at least im proud of the diagrams i did for econs ilp, haha hmph, i think i slacked -.- and now i seriously appreciate the diagrams that the lecturer has on the powerpoint...
hmm. right now i just want to sit back and do some silly things. like looking out of the window and stare into space. ohhh and ride down the expressway, maybe i should go home from the busstop opposite school so the bus will go on the expressway before reaching home. i need time to sort certain things out and the hyperness is not helping. hahaha. one great thing i like about being at home is that, you get the solitude sometimes. that few moments for me to be in my world. =)
it scares me sometimes to know how close you are. i am sorry but i do need space.
i cant get it why i trust my gut feeling so much. just that hunch. and wells, it does help when its usually quite accurate in some sense.
a certain feeling just comes and the next thing for me to do is to sit back and relax and see what happens. haha. hmm. not relaxing all the time especially when things dont seem that positive.
anyway, i doubt you will read this, but im giving you this chance. (: cos my intuitive feeling tells me that you are more than what you seem. im not going to dismiss you like what others did. im going to keep an open mind and see how you are going to prove to me that you are a worthy friend (: and of course, my favourite phrase - a nice person. hahaha.
words do hurt. gestures do hurt. but being stabbed from the back hurts even more. i know no better. 22:48
19 February 2006
hello blogspot.
leaving diary-x since it's down for so long and it seems to me that it's gonna be down infinitely. so wells, here i am. and seriously, resetting a blog without an old blog is one tough job. all the links gone and it's kind of exasperating. and come to think of it, im going to chuck my tutorials just to do this. this is madness.
anyway, had a thousand and one activities this week but nonetheless all fun ones (: see, the problem with a problematic blog at first is that i have to update loads. now. and that's kind of against my usual style of short blogging. ah whatever.
tuesday. ah ha was valentine's day, after the many days of letter writing to angel and mortal and the frantic buying of presents. hahaha. was really really touched that day cos seriously, little gifts matter a lot, afterall its the thought that counted (: thanks weeloon for the big tigger! and kegan for the water bottle.. haha. and 06s75! the photo frames, the bottles, the cookies, the chocolates and goodies! the cookies were really good, and addictive. haha. and i was frantically trying to do the many cross-stitches. all thanks to my great estimation of present-making time. the actual time doubled. -.- and i was feeling really cranky until shueli called at 12 plus in the morning to encourage me. thanks loads (: but wells, i still didnt manage to finish the presents. bleh. ><><>< sighh, but it's quite bad to lag so much after we left marche... okay so after jts, its time to save up again (:
