today, there were some points of time i felt so overwhelmed that i had to fight back my tears.
and of course, there were some moments i felt so confused too.
but this time round, im quite sure of what i want, though the more certain i am, the more afraid i get because just the thought of the unknown shudders me. i dont want to rebel against my parents though, it just isnt right. and i cant seem to muster enough courage in me yet, to barge through the barriers. the idea of talking to them about it is scary enough.
on the other hand, one thing for sure, i will not regret going for church today. i dont know whether i can still go in the weeks to come, i dont know when i'll muster enough courage to go ask (i guess today's out of the question), but i promise myself to try.
i want to learn to love You the way You loved me; 20:40
