i really enjoyed cg today (: even if i got into some kind of trouble because i didnt exactly explain how come i disappeared for the whole afternoon, but i think it's worth it.
suddenly, i feel even sadder that this will have to end soon. i made it a point to try to remember all those smiling faces today, every one of them. i just hope i wont tear next week or sth. bahhh.
i should stop my media player from playing something too sad now. let's kill the shuffle option. but wait, that playlist is way too sad.
and the funny thing is my brother sitting across the room is in an extremely foul mood. heh. 21:40
25 February 2008
inflation of 6.6%!
this is like seeing things we learnt in economics come alive, and my real income is falling haha.
time to tighten the belt, seriously. 22:02
24 February 2008
sunday afternoon and im bored at home seriously. rather be out there doing some painting, and do some meaningful work.
yesterday's class dinner (or rather group dinner) turned out surprisingly cozy despite the attendance. well well im definitely looking forward to the next class activity planned by someone else. heard its an ubin trip hmmm, would be interesting if it's the case haha.
but i suppose i was a little disappointed at myself, of that sudden bout of anger that came to me in the afternoon. getting myself so pissed off at that time, was really kind of redundant now that i think of it. but thankfully it subsided soon and very soon, otherwise i would have been kind of blinded to the little things that gave me a warm fuzzy feeling.
... like catching up with people that i havent been talking to since ages. (: it was not just one yesterday, but a rare couple of people.
photos soon once i get hold of them i guess.
and i didnt know singaporean women are so demanding until i saw the headlines for sunday times this morning. why get a guy to carry even your own handbag? this doesnt make sense at all heh. 16:00
21 February 2008
i was told that im transferring yesterday.
and it's rather a big shock i suppose. it's as though when i've finally caught hold on something, that something has to be taken away again. the news was unsettling, but i guess after thinking about it for one entire day, maybe it might be better in the long run. if that's for my good, might as well.
but it still feels like a joke, when new relationships have just been built and i have to leave. it's like handing in a piece of assignment, knowing well enough that i didnt finish.
this is not the year of rat, it's the year of change. 08:55
18 February 2008
こころがちょっといたい。 23:52
it's just one of those few times, i wish that time could be turned back so i would not have known something that i now know.
and sometimes ignorance does give me bliss. because the point of view is so much easier to handle. the more you know, the more responsibility you have to take up, and the more you cant stay the same way anymore.
it isnt just about a game of determination anymore.
some things change. some people change. some environments change. i change. it will be good if we change and fit in nicely into the picture, but what if it gets worse? the puzzle piece no longer fits. 12:51
14 February 2008
valentine's 08 lacked the hype unlike the two years in hc. but guess what, im now more sure of that one love that i cant leave out in my life.
that Love.
always enough for me no matter what, tugging at the exact heartstrings.
(: 22:00
13 February 2008
i dreamt of okonomiyaki last night...
and my craving for it now is ridiculous. urgh.
and here's a random thought from dreaming last night, what happens when the wronged becomes wrong? we can never know the clear definitions of what is wrong, cant we?
and now when people say our dreams are usually associated with our thoughts when we are wide awake, i start to wonder what exactly runs in my head. even as im typing this.
im actually thinking of where to get my hands on okonomiyaki. -.-
10:44
12 February 2008
eunice is currently on an unlucky streak and her stupidity has multiplied in the course of two days. ): so a levels results please dont come now, i think i will just go crazy.
it's been a while since i worried over job and income and money to get by, and they kind of haunted me again on my way home. take it this way, its not as though i was a spendthrift in the past, but i feel much poorer now that im not in school. stable expenditure, unstable income. hmmm. and it really doesnt help when the family isnt supportive of your lifestyle.
ahhh rants rants rants.
maybe its just the thought of being semi-unemployed again.
i'll be okay soon and very soon. 14:49
10 February 2008
eunice is sick.
she overate during chinese new year.
BIG sigh. 11:19
07 February 2008
first up, happy chinese new year to all (:
chinese new year has meant a different thing to me altogether now, because all those crazy companions that you have grown up with have already grown up too. the craziness will have to stop somewhere i believe. chinese new year for reunion? seems like its not exactly a very full reunion for my family, especially daddy's side. and reunion shouldnt be just reserved for chinese new years. the same concept goes for valentine's day heh.
dont make things commercialised. im guilty of this already, i've made cny an excuse to get new stuff.
but tomorrow should be an exciting day with all those familiar faces, both young and old. (:
anw, added a song from nobuta wo produce - a drama which really got me thinking. and the soundtrack got me thinking too, i wonder where i can get it from. 22:02
02 February 2008
sometimes i think i learn more when im out of school. because things we learn in school, those academic stuff, they cant be directly applied or even applied in out daily lives. how to cope with what we have and are given each day. who in the right mind uses calculus in our normal lives?
one thing i feel is that school has not taught me enough to handle relationships with people well enough. it's too sheltered an environment, the people are too similar, and it actually gave me a false impression that i know the world out there. all crap talk i think. because in school, we have the same concerns and same experiences, but everything changes since the year started. we each lead very different lifestyles, engage in different activities, it becomes harder to understand each other's plight anymore. and we have to self teach ourselves how to cope with all these changes, and i find it tough frankly.
i believe in this, for every friendship relationship, unless you let go on your own accord, i dont think i'll ever let go. i dont know whether it's feasible or not, because sometimes how things happen to work out seems rather hurtful. all the changes and the different circumstances, for every question, there is no more definite answer.
but im not going to let my constant slip out of my life. never. 23:27
01 February 2008
thanks for all the prayers, things have finally stabilised. yesterday was a scare, and it just reminded me that it's so freaking easy to just lose someone very very dear to me. the lesson of treasuring someone more always speaks to me, all the time. somehow i realised i will forget it somehow after a while. heh.
everything change, You are the only constant. just like a Daddy who's always in the room, whether i know it or not. .im still very thankful for that, because if You change too, i wonder what would happen.
tomorrow's my last day at john little expo, it's an interesting experience i would say. a chance to mingle with people from all walks of life, be it the customers or the colleagues. maybe an office environment would have been different, but i think such an environment does give me something more to learn. afterall the environment im exposed to via education can be quite selectively representative of society. this job, i enjoyed myself.
